Friday, March 1, 2013


Today is day the that changed the rest of my life..and every year, it means something new to me...

Seven years ago today, on February 28, 2006 at 4:45 p.m., I was told, "you have breast cancer".... And everything fell apart. Although 32 years old, I still saw myself as the 15-year old from Liberia, landing at JFK airport in New York, alone and scared...I would be joined with my parents soon, but in those moments, I made up my mind to make something of myself, so I'd never feel as vulnerable and scared as I did that day...and I did.

18 years later, I had everything I thought defined success-nice house, car, office, paycheck and health, my beautiful baby, Noelle, confidence to spare and I was on top of the world. Oh and I was engaged to get married. Within a month of my diagnosis, all of the material things and my idea of being perfectly healthy, were memories. Within two months, bald and sick, I could barely recognize the person in the mirror. What does a cancer patient look like, I asked myself then. The answer was, like me. Like so many other young adults diagnosed with cancer, it was like sinking into a swirling abyss. One day, I decided to ask God for help. We talked. I made a promise to give my life to him in service if he would restore my spirit and make me a vessel for his work.

The next day...this all began. Today is my seventh year - my d-day (diagnosis) day...but from today on the letter 'd' will signify the word 'divine' because we never know where our circumstances will lead us to if we give up the idea of what WE want, open our ears and hearts, listen and act. If I hadn't been diagnosed, I would never had started Tigerlily, met so many wonderful people, served so many, learned so much and know all of you. My daughter and I may not have that survivors bond that ties us together...she went through it too...and life would not be as exciting, crazy, nuts, at times terrifying, but fulfilling as all get out. How serendipitous that today is the day that I start my ' Fearless' book tour! Personal challenges don't have to stop you, but could be a breakthrough. We owe it to future generations to use everything in our power, including the 'bad' stuff, to advocate for change.

The Bible and numerology experts say that the number 7 is a holy and magical one, symbolizing completion. In Hebrew, seven is shevah, which means to be full or satisfied. It symbolizes a higher awareness. Today, in this moment, I feel complete, full and satisfied. I have all that I need, great friends, family, community, including someone special, who is always there... It was different, yet reassuring to have him sit with me in the doctor's office recently ... Seven years ago, my almost life partner (yikes - lol!) was too busy to show up. I'm thankful for everything that happened that year though... even the things I didn't desire. They were all for my higher good. What a difference time and personal growth makes. I don't know what life will bring, but that doesn't matter. For today, for now, all is as it should be. Shevah is my word for the day. 
Love always, M